Tuesday, January 09, 2007

Lessons

This past year has been one of roller coaster like extremes. Yet the one thing that has been constant in all of this has been the never ending unwavering love of G_d. Over the past year just about everything has been stripped out from under us. From the death of our son to the loss of my job right when we needed it the most, totally devastated us. It shook us to our foundations. The funny thing is that when you are shook to your foundation you find out just what that foundation is. For us it was Yeshua's love and grace. When the entire world was falling down around us He held us, comforted us, and sustained us. The one thing that I have found the hardest in all of this is writing about it all. I am normally a quiet reserved man, not given to discussing my personal pain. I would like to share what I have learned in all of the pain.


I have learned how to persevere through unimaginable pain. I once thought that the loss of one of my children would be the end of me. I have learned it is not. Has it changed me? Yes it has, but not in the ways I would have expected. I have learned to have more empathy for one thing, that has aways been hard for me. I have also learned that there are people out there ready to love regardless of your circumstance. I think that the most important thing I have learned is that He is more real than I could have ever imagined. Losing Samuel was the singularly hardest thing I have ever been through. When I was brought to my knees and laid lower than I could have thought possible Yeshua picked me up, dusted me off, and just held me in His arms. No words were ever needed. I wish I could adequately explain the experience, but I know that I could not do it justice. Life goes on and we still face struggles but we have learned to simply trust Him in all things He has a plan and it is perfect, that is assured. When things get bad I can always climb back up in my Daddy's lap and let Him take care of it.



Your Love Oh Lord

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